God’s Love Language

Recently, on my writer’s online discussion forum, someone was expressing the desire for support and recognition from her church family. Some writers feel very alone, unappreciated and unsupported. No one had asked them how things were going, no one offered a hug, and no one gave them a word of encouragement. I feel that the best way to express love is by showing a sincere interest in someone else. Dr. Gary Chapman, the author of “The Five Love Languages”, writes on his website, “Throughout all my counseling, I found that truly connecting with a loved one came down to one simple fact: you need to know and speak his or her love language.”  Dr. Chapman goes on to say that we can show love in five different ways: words of affirmation, receiving gifts, quality time, acts of service, and physical touch. So we may feel loved if we receive love in the same way that we need it.

But how do we show God that we love Him? When I sit down with pen and paper, I automatically have the desire to start complaining and wondering about the future. I want answers. I want a crystal ball. But I know that God is not a “magic genie” up in the sky. I know that I must trust God to care for my family and me. Instead of focussing on me, I need to show my love to God by asking about Him. How is Your day going, Lord? What’s new for You? Are You enjoying the world? How’s Jesus? Do you follow soccer? Seems a bit silly, but how do we show love to God?

We take an interest in Him. We give Him words of affirmation through our prayers, praises and worship. We give Him gifts – the gift of our tithes and we give Him our time in prayer and study. We can also show love through our acts of service and physical touch to those in need. Whatever we do for anyone in need, we do for Him. Loving God is not about going to church for an hour on Sundays. It means so much more. How are you expressing your love to Him?

The King will reply, ‘I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me’ (Matthew 25:40 NIV).

Symbols

As I walked down a busy city sidewalk enjoying some window-shopping for the upcoming season a white van, with a green company logo on its door, slammed on its brakes and the driver leaned on the horn. Obviously he was upset that the small red car had stolen the parking space in front of him. He let the world know that he was not happy about this. I’m sure if his window was down I would be able to hear him yelling at the driver of the little car. After his horn serenade, he screeched his tires and drove away.

I wondered if the company he worked for knew that he drove in such a manner. Would they be flattered that I remembered the company logo and now associate this company with the angry driver?

But then, a friend recently reminded me that it’s not only drivers that may not represent their company fairly. How many times do we ourselves do the same? But instead the emblem on our vehicle is a fish – representing that we are Christian. Or we may feature a sticker from a Christian radio station. And perhaps the day we are in a hurry, someone may want to squeeze his or her car in ahead of us but we’re unwilling to move. Or we tailgate a slower moving car on the highway. Or we mumble under our breath about the idiot who took up two parking spaces. Model Christian behaviour?

Maybe we should take off our emblems and stickers so we don’t falsely represent our faith. But would that really help? Or should we rather change our attitudes and stay on alert at all times? Regardless of whether or not we let the world know we are Christian on the outside, we should let the world know we are Christian on the inside. The only way anyone (even ourselves) can know we are Christians on the inside is if the new life is reflected on the outside. Faith can be seen only as it is lived.

As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead (James 2:26 NIV.)

Save the World

Wanting to save the world can feel overwhelming, especially in this past year. We have experienced so many major world catastrophes; where do we even start?

There are days when I think that I can’t possible be of help. I’ve got my own problems. But then my spirit is checked and I am reminded of small things I can do. I can donate my used VCR movies to a shelter for the homeless. I can donate my children’s outgrown clothes to the Diabetes association. I can add a few extra groceries in my cart each week to donate to the food bank. I can give a monthly donation of $10 to be automatically withdrawn to my favourite world mission. I can adopt a cat from the Humane Society. I can collect my pennies and drop them off when I pick up my cat. I can buy a poppy in November and wear it proudly on my coat. I can donate my used coats to Coats for Kids. I can donate my old glasses to a third world country. I can sponsor a child through Compassion or World Vision. I can buy a chicken, goat or cow for a family in a third world country. I can donate my coffee change for a child to go to camp. I can add a dollar to my grocery bill at the till to be given to the food bank. I can make a donation to catastrophe victims through my online banking. I can enter the Terry Fox run and collect pledges. I can buy a plant in support of cancer research. I can buy a grocery gift certificate and pass it along to a friend in need. I can volunteer my time to put together food hampers. I can visit a retirement home and talk with the elderly. I can write letters to inmates. I can have my haircut and donate it to make wigs for children.

As I write this, I am sure there are many more things that I can do – donate my money, my possessions, and my time – for worthy causes. If I think, “I can’t possibly make a difference” and hold onto my money, hoard my possessions and keep my time to myself then yes it is a self-fulfilling prophecy. However, if everyday I do something, anything, to help in a small way, then yes it will make a difference.

I remember hearing a story about a man who walked to the beach every morning and spent an hour throwing back starfish who had been beached. One day, another man came along and chastised him for doing this. He said, “Old man, you can’t possible make a difference here. Look at all the thousands of starfish. You’ll never be able to help them all.” The old man continued to return the starfish to the sea as he responded, “You may be right. But it does make a difference to this one.”

Think about how you may make a difference today – no matter how small.

Good will come to him who is generous and lends freely, who conducts his affairs with justice (Psalm 112:5 NIV.)

Life is like a Baseball Game

Goal planning is one of my favourite activities of the New Year. Each year, I look forward to sitting down with my orange file folder and reviewing the past year’s goals before setting pen to paper to make resolutions for the upcoming twelve months.

This past Saturday, I set aside time – when the house was quiet, with a hot cup of tea – to go about my yearly ritual. However, this year my goal planning felt very empty and unsatisfying. I put my papers away, disappointed that I did not feel filled with joy and hope for the coming months.

The next day at church, I listened intently as Pastor Jamie gave a sermon on how our life as Christians is similar to a baseball game. In baseball, there are three bases and a home plate. The goal is to hit a ball, and run to touch all successive bases before returning to home. Once home, your team scores a run.

As a Christian, the goal also is to reach each base and move on to the next one. At first base, we are called believers. This is where we first establish a relationship with God. At the heart of the gospel is the message of salvation. We can celebrate the new life we now have in Jesus Christ.

But we can’t stop there. We need to move on to second base where we are called worshipping believers. This is where we put Christ at the centre of our life. How do we know if we have moved on to second base and truly put Christ at the centre? Ask yourself a simple question, “Where does my mind dwell when I’m not doing something I have to do?” This question sat like a lead stone in my belly. I took some time to think about it. If I am not writing an article, adding an entry to my blog, or working on my teaching notes, where does my mind dwell? I have to be honest here; if I have no work that I absolutely must do, I find that my mind dwells on creating more work. My mind constantly returns to search for what I can do. What can I do to build a platform, to fill my resume, and to beef up my credentials? To be a worshipping believer means that I must put Christ at the centre of my life. He should be that which consumes me. But He hasn’t been. No wonder my goal planning had felt so shallow and unfulfilling. It was all about me —what I want. I’ve put me at the centre of my life.

Years ago, I posted a quote on my bulletin board that I feel I need to revisit, “You take care of My business, and I’ll take care of yours.” Now these are words to live by. If I put Christ front and centre then all else will fall into place. I need to refocus.

Pastor Jamie continued to say that third base is where we become growing believers. This is where we apply God’s principles to our life. James 1:19-21 says, “My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.”

Lastly, we arrive at home plate. Home is where we become serving believers. At this point, we become believers that make an impact with our life. The Book of James is one of my favourites in the Bible and James 2:17 provides another principle to live by, “ In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.”

So now I can return to my goal planning and strive to reach each successive base with the goal of home plate in mind.

It’s a Wonderful Life

Have you ever watched the movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life?” James Stewart stars as George Bailey, a man who wants nothing more than to leave his hometown and travel the world. However, his plans are never realized as life deals him a very different hand. He ends up taking over his father’s business, marrying his sweetheart, and raising a family. He feels robbed of his true calling and when he faces a jail sentence because of another man’s mistake, he considers taking his own life. This is when his guardian angel, Clarence, is sent from heaven to stop him from committing suicide. After much debate, George says, “It would have been better if I’d never been born.” In saying this, George is given the fantastic opportunity to see how his life affected and influenced the lives of so many others. Clarence shows him what his town would have looked like if it hadn’t been for all his good deeds over the years. In the end, George chooses to live when he sees how his life really did have meaning and that it would not have been better if he were never born.

I bought the video years ago and it has become a yearly ritual to watch it at Christmas time. This movie has profound meaning to me. It reminds me that I am not an island and it asks me to consider my life in view of how it has affected others. Did my life make a difference?

It’s too easy to fall into the trap of believing that life is all about me, about what I want out of it. Yet truly, life is to be lived, not for us, but for others. When you think of Mother Theresa, it is obvious that she lived for others. Her life made a significant difference in the lives of many.

But we are not all called to be a “Mother Theresa”. We are called to make a difference where we are – with our spouse, our children, our boss, our co-workers, and our neighbours. We are called to make a difference where God has placed us. Today, ask yourself, “What difference does my life make?”

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms (1 Peter 4:10 NIV.)

Here and Now

I mounted a mirror in my office today. It’s not so that I can check my hair as I work during the day, or to make sure that I don’t have anything in my teeth after lunch. I’ve mounted this mirror purely as a symbol of how I want to live. It is a reminder for me to live in the today.

I find that there are certain times in my life when I become anxious about the future. Where will I be? What will I be doing? This is especially true as a self-employed person who works contract to contract. I can get easily distracted by and consumed with anxiety over the next month.

There was a time, not long ago, that I was fretting about this same issue. God spoke to my spirit and reminded me then to focus on the here and now. He did this through a vision. God gave me a picture of me on a beach. On this beach there were a number of boxes. Some boxes had lids on them and were closed, while other boxes sat open. These boxes represented events in my life. The closed boxes were my past; the open boxes were my future. Then as I stood looking at the future boxes, wanting to glimpse inside them to see what was in store for me, a large mirror – three times the size of me – was erected between the boxes of the past and the boxes of the future. God spoke into my heart and said that the boxes of the past were closed and there was no need for me to spend time with them. The boxes of the future were on the other side of the mirror and there was no need for me to be anxious. So every time I felt like looking ahead, I was confronted with this mirror reminding me to stay in the moment.

So now the mirror in the office is mounted to remind me to focus on today, to not fret about the past and not be anxious about the future.

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34 NIV.)

Fanatical

The year was 1991. Laurier faced Mt. Allison at the Sky Dome for the Vanier Cup. This was my graduating year from Wilfrid Laurier University, so six of my girlfriends and I decided to go to the championship football game.

We drove from Waterloo to Toronto, and then took the subway into downtown. The excitement in the air was energizing. Most fans dressed in the WLU colours of purple and gold. I remember wearing a gold coloured scarf to support my team.

Once at the stadium, we found our seats and joined in the cheering. What a game! I had never been to a football game and so my best friend described to me exactly what was happening. It was so much fun. I was caught up in the brouhaha and yelled and screamed until my voice was raw. I’m not sure why I even bought a seat because I didn’t sit down for the entire game. I waved my scarf up in the air until my arms were tired. You can imagine the burst of sheer joy when my team won the cup. The party continued late into the night. I was elated that my team had won. I was proud to be a Laurier student. I was happy to be on the winning team.

Remembering that football game reminded me of a poster my son had in his bedroom. It was a picture of a muscle-clad man sporting a t-shirt with the motto, “Be on the winning team!” At the bottom it clarified, “God’s team.”

I am a member of God’s team. I joined when I gave my heart to Jesus. I feel proud to be a Christian. I am happy knowing that when I die I’ll go to heaven.

Funny though, one would think that my salvation is a little more important than my favourite team winning a sports event. Knowing where I will spend eternity is a tad bit more inspiring than a plaque on the wall with the year of the championship. So why don’t I treat it as such?

Why can I go to a football game and scream, jump and raise my arms in support of my team, yet on Sundays at church, I am reluctant to even raise a hand? Why is it that as a fan of a sporting event I feel it’s okay to act fanatical, but within the walls of my own church family I am so much more reserved?

This year, I resolve to act more enthusiastic about what truly matters in life. I’m going to sing out loud, cheer, and yes, I’m going to raise both my arms at church.

David, wearing a linen ephod, danced before the LORD with all his might, while he and the entire house of Israel brought up the ark of the LORD with shouts and the sound of trumpets (2 Samuel 6:14-15 NIV.)